For Jacob Little, being killed in a bar fight was not what he had planned to do last Saturday night.

Plans change though.

According to the police report, Jacob had gone to the Coach Bar in East Philadelphia to celebrate his second cousins third marriage to his sisters God-mother.

Friends and family say that in reality, the marriage was just an excuse for Jacob to go out

“The second we walked into tha Coach, Jacob sees his ex Michelle.” Frank Lippson, Jacobs best friend, told us by phone last Sunday, “Ands we all knows that Jacob didn’t need to be anywhere nears Michelle.

They had broken up not even thirty six hours before when Michelle told him she had tha crotch warts (genital) and it was probably best if she let him know.

But tha fuckin thing is, see, they had already been going at it for three months. One time even dirty dancin on my moms dining room table. I tell ya what, I never have looked at that table the same, even more so since learnin of her vag pox.

I mean, my god damned grammy eats at that table. So yeah, Michelles a bitch.

Well, Jacob says it’s all cool and that he ain’t gonna start no shit, he just wants to celebrate the beauty of the marriage. Ten minutes later, fuckin Michelle has edged her way next to our table with her date, some Filipino dude……

Where she found a Filipino living in our neighborhood I swear, I’ll never know, but she did and they were both makin all loud an warty not two feet from us.

Finally, Jackie boy had had enough and said that he wanted to get the fuck out of there before he did something that he’d regret. Well the Filipino from East Philly overhears Jacob and takes it as a threat.

He was drunk already on account that he was a little guy who couldn’t handle his liqueur. Well, he gets all up in Jacobs face, yelling about how Jacob better watch his mouth or he might find himself all cut up.

None of us took the threat seriously because a knife threat in Philly is a dime a dozen. One time my mother told me I better straightin up in church or she’d cut me, I think I was like eight years old or somethin.

Anyways, Jacob laughs it off and pushes the Filipino dude out of the way using just a finger. That seriously pissed off the little guy and he goes all ninja on us.

He starts wailing around saying he knows shit and how to hurt us real bad. We all laughed and start walking when the little fucker pulls out a fucking knife the size of his fuckin leg and just tears into Jacob.

There was blood everywhere and we were all just stunned like we were seeing a circus trick. I think I snapped first and pulled the guy off but by then it was to late, Jackie boy was dying……

Lemme tell ya man, he was pissed about it.

Somehow, while we were all lookin after my bro, the little ninja bolted away from us and flew out the door. That little fucks still gone, no idea where he’s hiding…..

Well when Jacob found that out, it just pissed him off even more. As he laid there dying with his last breath he screamed out, “as God is my witness, I am going to come back from the dead and kill that little fucker! Even if it takes me all night, I will figure out how to do it! I’ll rise up, get a clean shirt and pants and then spend the rest of the day lookin for that bastard”.

I tell you what, I don’t think there was a person in that bar that didn’t believe he might just do it, he was that pissed.”

As of this posting, Jacobs funeral is set for Wednesday at the Grey Lagoon Cemetery. Services begin at 10 a.m